A rare meme from Mr Sarcasm

[jchrisobrien]

I have disable IP logging.  Now I want you to do something for me.

Post something anonymously.  Whatever you desire.

A story, a secret, a confession, a fear, a love - anything. Be sure to post anonymously and honestly.

You know you want to.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

You're a nice gyu! I like you ^_______^

[silas7.livejournal.com]

Many thanks!

[(Anonymous)]

I've had a crush on you on and off for several years.

[silas7.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry to have been ignorant of it, or of doing those things which might have put you off. Unless, it's excessive apologizing. I don't apologize for that! *grin*

[(Anonymous)]

Apologies are unnecessary. You didn't do anything to put me off, an if I had wanted you to not be ignorant, you wouldn't have been.

[(Anonymous)]

I don't actually like people (as a species)... ssssshhh!

[silas7.livejournal.com]

It's hard to like people as a species. The larger the group, the lower the denominator. It's only on a closer personal level that people can shine, when then become an individual and not a faceless mass.

That being said, some people aren't that likeable close up.

Stick by the good ones!

[(Anonymous)]

i desperately want to fix you up with a friend of mine with whom you'd get along quite well, but it just hasn't been able to happen yet.

[silas7.livejournal.com]

I have not had the best luck with such situations, but anything is possible and I've changed much since the last time that happened.

That means it's been a while. Oops.

If it happens, it will happen. I really appreciate you looking out for me like that!

[(Anonymous)]

After a day like today, I could really go for a glass (or a pitcher) of your patented sangria!

[silas7.livejournal.com]

Some days, I could go for a 20 gallon drum of my patented sangria!

The spring and summer will be upon us soon, and there will be plenty of opportunities for sangria. I'll save you a glass!

[(Anonymous)]

Nothing turns me on like being tied down.

[silas7.livejournal.com]

!!!

[(Anonymous)]

I'm really, really in love again. It has been a year since I've felt this way, and the last one ended pretty badly.

It's magical. Wondrous. Scary as Hell. I trust him completely. It does help that we were friends for years, first. A lot of the work has already been done. He's amazing. We are so well suited it is astonishing. We certainly took our time getting to this place, but it's as close to perfection as anything I've ever known.

Nobody from our circle of friends knows. We decided that we wanted to keep it a secret, while it was this embryonic, and have some fun surprising people by showing up to a party at some point as a couple. I can't wait to see the looks on their faces.

But the fact that we're keeping it a secret means that I'm ready to explode. Good timing on the confessional, thank you.

[silas7.livejournal.com]

There's nothing that burns brighter, that consumes the soul, than the fires of passion. It's so beautiful.

The mystery is extra special, because it could be from a varying circle of people. I hope I get to see your big debut!

[(Anonymous)]

other people are not nearly as together as you seem to think they are. they all get by just as you do. they are in the middle of their own maelstrom of confusion, desire, need and limitations just like you are. it's just that their issues are not the same as your issues and visa-versa. don't go beating yourself up just because their issues don't cut you as deeply as yours do.

[silas7.livejournal.com]

It's such an easy, selfish fantasy to get into. We (and I mean I) find it easy to look at people who seem to have what we want, and imagine that their lives and rich and fulfilling and perfect. It's not perfection though, just our idea of it. Which may not be their idea at all. Just seeing someone at a party, reading their journal, that doesn't really let you know everything that is going on. Some people hide their pain and confusion. That doesn't mean it doesn't exist.

This is a very vital thing to remember. Thank you very, very much for saying this.

[(Anonymous)]

I agree with that last person. And I hope you get what you want.

[silas7.livejournal.com]

I certainly have a better grip on what I want now. You can't get what you want until you know what you want. I know what that is. Now, there's only the getting.

[(Anonymous)]

sometimes i feel like you're not comfortable with yourself, and that kind of makes me uncomfortable too. There's a good chance i'm just projecting though. i do think you are a good person though, and i wish i knew you better.

[silas7.livejournal.com]

That actually makes a lot of sense. I hope that as I grow more comfortable with myself (and I do lately, day by day) that others will grow more comfortable with me.

You can get to know me better if you like. Despite my quiet exterior, I am pretty accessible.

[(Anonymous)]

Occasionally I think about really wanting to kiss you.

[silas7.livejournal.com]

I've been told that I'm a really good kisser.
I'm just sayin'.

Many times there are impulses we shouldn't act on, which is a good thing. But, it is very nice to know that you are kissable. :)

[silas7.livejournal.com]

rather, that one is kissable.

[(Anonymous)]

Since I have known you, you seem to have become so much more comfortable with yourself. (Yes, seems to be a trend in the comments here, but I found myself on the other side of the fence from the others...)

It was like seeing you under old layers of Self/Being when we first met years ago, and the old layers seemed uncomfortable and ill-fitting, but the newer you, the present-day you would shine and sparkle through the rips and holes in the old self. Especially when you would dance, this new and more real-seeming you would shine through strongly. You seemed so insecure about this newer you, about letting go of the old and the familiar, and yet the old layers seemed to chafe at you strongly at the same time.

I could see that I did the same thing and could hear the voices in my life telling me to let go of the old and step out into the new with trust and faith that what felt good from the inside out *was* good. It always seemed difficult to me - I couldn't figure out how to just let go of the weight... until I met you, and watched you, and was inspired by the you that was shining through the old you.... and I could see how easily you could just shrug off what was outdated like an old coat...and walk away... if you wanted to.

These days, those old layers I thought I saw seem mostly gone and when you dance, it is a solid glow that emanates from you. There is a strength in you that used to seem held in from the outside inward... and now glows from the inside outward. Maybe in the piles of stuff left behind from your old apartment, there are old layers of self like old coats... left behind and not missed.

You seem much lighter. More at peace with yourself and your world, and less encumbered by the nonsense of the worlds around you.

You continue to inspire me each time I see you.

(And did I mention you're damn sexy?)(and more so all the time!!!)

[silas7.livejournal.com]

Hmm... what side of the fence could that be?

What's even more gratifiying than other people seeing me grow, is seeing myself grow. Believing in myself the way that others believed in me. Internalizing it. Making it mine.

I am humbled and honored to be an inspiration to you.

*hugs*

you didn't mention the sexiness, but I thank you for saying so. I would also have to agree with you. ;)

[(Anonymous)]

I envy you. I'm very uncomfortable with myself, because I'm not the way I used to be. I used to be very happy with myself, but whenever I get to thinking about it now, I'm missing so much. I feel like I had everything, and then lost most of it. I can't even pick myself up to try to rebuild myself. I know I need to fix my own self, but I feel like I'm missing out on so many experiences and feelings. Like I'm shut out, and it's not a good feeling. No matter what's good, it's always at my core that I'm not good. I'm not who I loved in myself, and it's sad. I wish I could still have the people that used to always be here for me, but I made a bad decision and now they're hardly in my life. Now all I'm left to deal with are things I don't want to, other people put things on me I don't need; I don't get anything from them to help me. It's unprovoked, which just makes it worse. No one ever asks me questions, and I think if someone is asked questions, it gives that person a sense of usefulness and self, because the answers always come from within. It's like no one cares about me. If I had a family, maybe my life would be different, but I really have no one constant. It's buffetting, and it's hard to stay on my feet. I want to feel whatever I feel, but sometimes I get tired of feeling bad. I want to be, feel like I did before when I was so pensive and full of answers. I don't know what's in me anymore. But it doesn't seem like much.

[silas7.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry I missed this. I meant this to be a confessional, not as an ego trip, or a means to fix things. Perhaps you don't need to hear anything in return, that you are releasing pent up anger. That's fine. Empty yourself, fully, then you can see to filling yourself again. I think that everything starts again when you find something in yourself and love it, and nourish it, and let it grow. Start really small.

This can sound pithy and sad. I don't mean it to be. I hope that you find something to grow on.

[(Anonymous)]

Why am I so intrigued by you?

I happened to be going through friends of friends journals.. and found you.

I met you once. If you would want to call it a meeting. I met an aspect of you more or less.. I was not myself and uncomfortable and so when we "met" I didn't run the character right and made you laugh more than impress. Just another imbecile girl I was.

Then months later I saw you again.. and wished I had the courage to speak to you.. even a hello, but was star struck. The last time I saw you, it hit me again like a ton of bricks. Yet there is nothing more beautiful than watching someone dance in the dark.. its much better than talking anyway.

[silas7.livejournal.com]

Now that's all kinds of interesting.

If there's no talking, there can be no communication! But conversations might not end up the way we want them to. I'm certainly no stranger to the fear of the spoken word.

I don't plan to stop dancing anytime soon, if that helps.