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jchrisobrienThis unemployment thing is starting to wear on me.
People will ask me how I'm doing, and I want to say something better than " same old same old." I paint, I surf the Internet, I send out job applications. I watch Aqua Teen Hunger Force and Clone High on my computer, and then I paint some more. I spend the majority of my day at home, in the same place. My Creativity Table holds my computer and my painting area now. So I don't need to move at all. Lately, I've felt a malaise falling over me the longer I sit here. I read friend's entries and e-mail, but I don't respond.
Now, the answer to all this is fairly obvious. Get away from the desk! Going to the gym always energizes me and breaks the monotony. If I move to the next room, I can watch movies (my roommate still has films I haven't seen yet), read books (one I have to review for my mother), and wander around town more. Which means braving these arctic temperatures. Brr.
You know what else it is? When you are working, even if it's at a shitty job, you are producing something. You are helping society function, part of the great machine that keeps the country and economy running. You can say you've accomplished something at the end of the day (hopefully). When you're not working, you aren't helping. In my case, I'm not taking care of myself. I'm not working for my money, which is always a punch in the gut to your self-esteem.
HOWEVER.
I didn't ask to be laid off. I am trying to find work. I am completing tasks (mostly painting), but I have tangible results at the end of the day. It's just a matter of adding more variety to the day. Of focusing your will and writing. Of getting out of the house and getting back into the world.
Change will come.
People will ask me how I'm doing, and I want to say something better than " same old same old." I paint, I surf the Internet, I send out job applications. I watch Aqua Teen Hunger Force and Clone High on my computer, and then I paint some more. I spend the majority of my day at home, in the same place. My Creativity Table holds my computer and my painting area now. So I don't need to move at all. Lately, I've felt a malaise falling over me the longer I sit here. I read friend's entries and e-mail, but I don't respond.
Now, the answer to all this is fairly obvious. Get away from the desk! Going to the gym always energizes me and breaks the monotony. If I move to the next room, I can watch movies (my roommate still has films I haven't seen yet), read books (one I have to review for my mother), and wander around town more. Which means braving these arctic temperatures. Brr.
You know what else it is? When you are working, even if it's at a shitty job, you are producing something. You are helping society function, part of the great machine that keeps the country and economy running. You can say you've accomplished something at the end of the day (hopefully). When you're not working, you aren't helping. In my case, I'm not taking care of myself. I'm not working for my money, which is always a punch in the gut to your self-esteem.
HOWEVER.
I didn't ask to be laid off. I am trying to find work. I am completing tasks (mostly painting), but I have tangible results at the end of the day. It's just a matter of adding more variety to the day. Of focusing your will and writing. Of getting out of the house and getting back into the world.
Change will come.
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no subject
Date: 2003-02-13 04:32 pm (UTC)