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Post Holiday highs and lows.
Dec. 30th, 2011 01:29 pmI think there was something awesome going on during the 23rd but it escapes me at the moment.
Christmas Eve I learned about a new awesome show (Community) at Richard's new house. We watched Tucker and Dale vs Evil while opening our stockings, filling up on spiked egg nogg, and enjoying our traditional Chinese food repast. Christmas day was spent quietly at home painting, and watching my present (King Fu Panda 2), then it was off to Christmas dinner with Nicole and a handful of other local folks. Good times were had by add, but I zoned out when all the Asian men talked about laser hair removal. Irish men are not hairless! Monday's Snow Ball in Hell was very festive, and firing on all cylinders. Too many cylinders, it seems.
My trip to visit the family was compounded by being hung over, stuck in lots of traffic, and leaving way off schedule with inadequate gift preparation. This led to a pretty miserable time when I actually arrived. The food was delicious, my uncle's told some amusing stories about being a horrible private in the army (ducking out of marches, pulling in favors from a colonel to avoid Korea, and getting sent to Germany w/out the colonel's help., getting an honorable discharge from pneumonia and set to a hospital with amputees). That same uncle came back to New York, adn ended up being the technical director at Madison Square Garden for forty odd years. Some people clearly aren't cut out to be soldiers, but still do OK for themselves. My other uncle worked for the government and the military, but was a civilian. The government gave him a false identity as a colonel, so he could have access and freedom to work on military bases. His job is still classified to this day, but it does involve working on radar installations and electronic warfare. I did a small family Christmas with my mom and dad, who were a bit alarmed at my behavior, but I was better the next day and drove back in good spirits.
I'd attribute my stress to a bad week, lack of sleep, food coma, driving aggravation, and a bit of shame at not being more prepared. There are also some long dormant feelings being stirred up in my therapy lately. My estrangement from my sisters, the distance between my and my parents both physical and emotional, and a degree of resentment for them not making me a stronger person. I think I've done a lot of be that stronger person now, but had I been this strong growing up? Hell, none of you would know me now, or at least not personally. It's useless to play the "what if" game, but you can learn from the past, and in doing so change the future.
Hey look, that entry got away from me again. Where does that leave me? Despite some slightly rocky sleep, I'm definitely feeling better and looking forward to this weekend. I definitely go through some dips and crests emotionall like a wave. That wave is currently rising, and I think it will cascade me forward into 2012 on a sweet wave. Bring your boards!
Christmas Eve I learned about a new awesome show (Community) at Richard's new house. We watched Tucker and Dale vs Evil while opening our stockings, filling up on spiked egg nogg, and enjoying our traditional Chinese food repast. Christmas day was spent quietly at home painting, and watching my present (King Fu Panda 2), then it was off to Christmas dinner with Nicole and a handful of other local folks. Good times were had by add, but I zoned out when all the Asian men talked about laser hair removal. Irish men are not hairless! Monday's Snow Ball in Hell was very festive, and firing on all cylinders. Too many cylinders, it seems.
My trip to visit the family was compounded by being hung over, stuck in lots of traffic, and leaving way off schedule with inadequate gift preparation. This led to a pretty miserable time when I actually arrived. The food was delicious, my uncle's told some amusing stories about being a horrible private in the army (ducking out of marches, pulling in favors from a colonel to avoid Korea, and getting sent to Germany w/out the colonel's help., getting an honorable discharge from pneumonia and set to a hospital with amputees). That same uncle came back to New York, adn ended up being the technical director at Madison Square Garden for forty odd years. Some people clearly aren't cut out to be soldiers, but still do OK for themselves. My other uncle worked for the government and the military, but was a civilian. The government gave him a false identity as a colonel, so he could have access and freedom to work on military bases. His job is still classified to this day, but it does involve working on radar installations and electronic warfare. I did a small family Christmas with my mom and dad, who were a bit alarmed at my behavior, but I was better the next day and drove back in good spirits.
I'd attribute my stress to a bad week, lack of sleep, food coma, driving aggravation, and a bit of shame at not being more prepared. There are also some long dormant feelings being stirred up in my therapy lately. My estrangement from my sisters, the distance between my and my parents both physical and emotional, and a degree of resentment for them not making me a stronger person. I think I've done a lot of be that stronger person now, but had I been this strong growing up? Hell, none of you would know me now, or at least not personally. It's useless to play the "what if" game, but you can learn from the past, and in doing so change the future.
Hey look, that entry got away from me again. Where does that leave me? Despite some slightly rocky sleep, I'm definitely feeling better and looking forward to this weekend. I definitely go through some dips and crests emotionall like a wave. That wave is currently rising, and I think it will cascade me forward into 2012 on a sweet wave. Bring your boards!
