Moments in Time

My leg won't stop shaking. The opening chords are on for Space Oddity, it's a slow song to sing for a kareoke night, but I wanted to make sure it was in my range, and that my voice wasn't suffering from long misuse. The song progresses, and I put some inflection in my voice, sliding between the lower and higher ranges, to distinguish between Major Tom and Ground Control. The song finishes and I clap to the beat. Then the audience claps. I hear whooping noises coming from the corner. Grins flashing from the darkness, light bouncing off the army of bottles rapidly amassing on our table. Ground control, voice functions are online and five by five.
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Four a.m. If there's ever a place you don't want to be, it's sleeping on the floor with a head full of booze and insecurity and longing. Your body shifts but finds no comfort. Your brain tries to placate itself, but the specter has more strength at night. Time slides backwards, to years where this feeling was all too familiar. It will never change, Chris. It will never change. shut up always alone fuck you always this way ...
should have squished into the bed Double fold the mattress, rearrange the pillows, glimpse the slow spread of dawn through the window. Driving ninety miles home in a short while, Chris. The comfort factor increases marginally, but just enough. The specters voices are drowned in an all encompassing roar that sounds more like the ocean than the damned. Sleep comes.
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Suspicions are dispelled, confirmation is achieved. A small, quiet moment of happiness grips the heart.
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Beware the purple jello shots. And the red. And the blue. And the cider that just doesn't stop flowing. Wander through a house of many different subtle hues, dim lights and insidious music woven through the murmurs of conversation. Witness the rarity of two different social groups interacting in harmony. Smile at the new faces. Remember the ones that smile back, holding your gaze a little longer than normal. Then remember that most of those you behold are twelve years your junior. Smile and raise your glass. Every smile and wink is another validation, more weight to balance the scales and tip them to a more favorable side.
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"Congratulations, Chris. Jim is one of the best players in the area, sounds like a great game."
"I just sat there and watched Chris play one of the most brilliant games I've ever seen him do, cracking the very tough nut that was my deployment."
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The sound of a Christian revival service is not what you expect to hear at a sushi restaurant. But the noise next store couldn't drown out the conversation, which was a marvel to have. There's nothing more wonderful than a direct, heartfelt conversation between two people. We talked about recent changes in my life for the better, how to approach new events, progressing against old fears, and an affirmation to keep romanticism alive in a cold, cynical world.

Snicker

SCORPIO (Oct 23-Nov 21)

Week of November 1, 2001

The government has criminalized all the chemical compounds of peyote, even though one ingredient, dopamine, is a primary neurotransmitter in the human brain. Our gray matter also produces anandamide, a substance that's nearly identical to THC, the active ingredient in marijuana. In other words, Scorpio, your brain is literally illegal. It's probably best, given your outlaw status, that you don't break any more laws of the land. However, there are plenty of other antiquated rules, stupid traditions, and vested interests that you can transgress with gleeful impunity. The astrological omens indicate that's exactly what you should do.