(no subject)

[jchrisobrien]

When people say you are trying too hard, that's not what they mean.
When peopel say you are looking too hard, that's not what they man.
What they really mean is, you want it too much.

How do you not want it too much?

I hope my dreams are more comforting than my reality tonight...

Comments

[loxocele.livejournal.com]

i think what they mean is, they are frightened.

no one likes to let other people down. somewhere, deep inside, we'd all rather make the people around us happy than not; it spares our friends pain and spares us the guilt - which is, of course, a powerful motivator (base though it may seem - but isn't instinct base to begin with?)

when someone is "trying too hard," or "wanting too hard" as you put it, sometimes people get uncomfortable. when? when they can't relate, when they can't return the amount of intensity they are given. why? well, no one wants to feel like they're not living up to expectations, for starters - even if those expectations aren't ones they themselves hold. no one really enjoys letting people down, or having to say, "sorry, look somewhere else" - all of which can make anything percieved as an overwhelming amount of need pretty scary, esp. when the observer knows there's nothing they can do.

as i said the other night, this may all sound trite coming from someone who hasn't been in your posistion for a few years...who's infact been in the *opposite* posistion for a while...but food for thought, at any rate.

i wish you peace, still.

[(Anonymous)]

It sounds like you have a habit of falling in love with your friends. I don't blame you, when you spend time with a great person, an attraction will often develop. Nevertheless, it sounds like you could do with a few more adventures of your own before you look for love. It hardly ever happens when you're looking, but if you're lonely, it's hard not to. You will find love, but don't keep looking out of the corner of your eye for it. Maybe it would be worthwhile to broaden your circle of friends, go to some new places alone, etc. Love is never who or what you expect it to be...