jchrisobrien: (big trouble!)
jchrisobrien ([personal profile] jchrisobrien) wrote2005-10-04 02:04 pm

Office Ninja 1, Cubicle 0

One of the great acts of office stupidity is putting a cubicle up in an office, in such a way that it blocks your access to the network ports in the wall.  How can you troubleshoot if you can't get to the jacks?

1. Remove the slats at the bottom of the cubicle.
2. Snake your arm inside (this is easier if you don't have big muscly forearms, but it can be done).
3. Remove the short, inefficient network cable.
4. Feed the longer network cable in until you can grab it.
5. Twist it around in two fingers, while feeling for the network port blindly.  Try not to think about the electrical socket nearby
6. Insert the network jack blindly, taking a break while your arm uncramps
7. Remove your arm ::edit:: from the hole:: (w/out losing any skin!)
8. Test the network connection.  If you are reading this, then you'll know my mission was successful.
9. Go and get a well deserved lunch.

[identity profile] unseelie.livejournal.com 2005-10-04 06:09 pm (UTC)(link)

7. Remove your arm (w/out losing any skin!)

umm
you use - like - laser surgical tools for this bit?
or are you like - some Cyber-Ninja - with like - hot swappable limbs?

[identity profile] silas7.livejournal.com 2005-10-04 06:45 pm (UTC)(link)
All my limbs are hot swappable! ;)

(goes back and edits post)

[identity profile] anna-phylaxis.livejournal.com 2005-10-04 07:44 pm (UTC)(link)
7. Remove your arm ::edit:: from the hole:: (w/out losing any skin!)

Hey, Freud, how's your vagina dentata?

/me ducks and runs

[identity profile] silas7.livejournal.com 2005-10-04 08:06 pm (UTC)(link)
it's deliberately provocative ;)

[identity profile] anna-phylaxis.livejournal.com 2005-10-04 08:20 pm (UTC)(link)
I just can't resist a good provocation.

[identity profile] carta.livejournal.com 2005-10-04 07:17 pm (UTC)(link)
::applause::

[identity profile] silas7.livejournal.com 2005-10-04 07:39 pm (UTC)(link)
*takes a bow*

yikes

[identity profile] flutterby369.livejournal.com 2005-10-04 08:38 pm (UTC)(link)
lol, sorry, could not help seeing all this in my mind, seen it too many times before, a few shocks for some, a few cuts on others. glad to hear you came out fine.

Re: yikes

[identity profile] silas7.livejournal.com 2005-10-05 02:28 pm (UTC)(link)
All's well that ends well, except for a little sweat. It's hot in my little cubicle.

Re: yikes

[identity profile] flutterby369.livejournal.com 2005-10-05 02:31 pm (UTC)(link)
LOL, I can just imagine, especially when (in my old office) the person who is heading the whole unit is going through menapause and feels that it is too cold when it is 80 degrees INSIDE!!

[identity profile] clayrobeson.livejournal.com 2005-10-04 09:07 pm (UTC)(link)
Why is your arm in someone's hole???

[identity profile] silas7.livejournal.com 2005-10-05 02:28 pm (UTC)(link)
I was looking for treasure!

[identity profile] sinspired.livejournal.com 2005-10-05 04:56 pm (UTC)(link)
I'm wondering if you ever do find treasure with your arm in someone's hole...

[identity profile] talesinsdaughtr.livejournal.com 2005-10-05 05:59 am (UTC)(link)
heh Laurels to you, mighty office ninja :)

And that editing job doesn't improve the sentence so much as take in a new 'wrong' direction ;)

[identity profile] silas7.livejournal.com 2005-10-05 02:29 pm (UTC)(link)
I have faith in the degeneracy of my audience ;)

[identity profile] tharain.livejournal.com 2005-10-07 08:34 pm (UTC)(link)
I come at this problem from the front end (and the comment about holes and arms is firmly in my mind as I write this, so i'm trying to be clear), as an installation ninja. I've been asked by clients on several occasions to do precisely what you described: set a cube that covers the jacks and power ports. I invariably point out the evils of this choice. They invariably complain. I usually convince them to do a different set up. On one noteable occasion, however, it was the only way to set the system furniture. So. I instructed my installing minions to cut a hole in the bottom of the panel directly over the outlet/jac/port location, finish it off as best they could, and thus give the weary tech man clear and easy access.

I love and coddle my tech people like the precious jewels they are.