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State of the Nation
Apr. 7th, 2015 01:09 pmAhem.
The snowiest winter in Boston on record is over. Yes, I do feel comfortable in saying that. It's official now because the ten foot wall of snow in the back of my driveway is gone, and I can drive out of it again. That freedom of mobility shines a light on how trapped or stuck I felt mentally, and how that too is changing with the warming weather.
Hobby wise this has been a great year for me. I've placed 12th and 2nd at two large Grand Tounnaments, both of which bode well for going to the US Masters next year. I will also be playing for the US team in Prague since one of the players will have to miss the event due to a wedding in the family. I will be missing a tournament at the end of September to attend a wedding as well, but I have no problem with that considering how awesome the couple is being married.
Work is work. A side effect of the therapy work I've been doing is detaching personal feelings from fixing work issues. Less getting angry or frustrated at not getting the answer, less turning their problem into proof of my own worth or value. The therapy has moved to a new stage, one that recognizes the very traumatic things that happened when I was younger, being mindful of how they make me feel, and having the compassion to forgive myself rather than punish. Each instance I revisit is another chance to reset how I feel about it and make positive connections. We are a collection of learned behaviors, and behaviors can be changed, with attention and time.
The goal for now is to write something on Friday to recap the week I'm going through, and on Monday to recap the weekend. Two updates a week is a pretty reasonable goal.
The snowiest winter in Boston on record is over. Yes, I do feel comfortable in saying that. It's official now because the ten foot wall of snow in the back of my driveway is gone, and I can drive out of it again. That freedom of mobility shines a light on how trapped or stuck I felt mentally, and how that too is changing with the warming weather.
Hobby wise this has been a great year for me. I've placed 12th and 2nd at two large Grand Tounnaments, both of which bode well for going to the US Masters next year. I will also be playing for the US team in Prague since one of the players will have to miss the event due to a wedding in the family. I will be missing a tournament at the end of September to attend a wedding as well, but I have no problem with that considering how awesome the couple is being married.
Work is work. A side effect of the therapy work I've been doing is detaching personal feelings from fixing work issues. Less getting angry or frustrated at not getting the answer, less turning their problem into proof of my own worth or value. The therapy has moved to a new stage, one that recognizes the very traumatic things that happened when I was younger, being mindful of how they make me feel, and having the compassion to forgive myself rather than punish. Each instance I revisit is another chance to reset how I feel about it and make positive connections. We are a collection of learned behaviors, and behaviors can be changed, with attention and time.
The goal for now is to write something on Friday to recap the week I'm going through, and on Monday to recap the weekend. Two updates a week is a pretty reasonable goal.
