Not venting as venting

[jchrisobrien]

I did some personal writing earlier in the day, when the skies inside my head were still overcast and grey. Looking back on it later, with objectivity, I see some answers. We're up to party cloudy skies. The weather, it changes all the time. You can carry an umbrella against the weather, but when the storm is a raging, you're going to get wet.

I prefer the storms outside my head.

I used to think that all the opinions I had when I was in a bad mood were the true opinions, because in my anger or sorrow I felt I was cutting through the lies we tell ourselves and seeing the truth. Today's exercise showed me a different perspective. Anger and sorrow can force you to choose a belieft and fuel it with the passion of that emotion, but it's fueled with anger or sorrow. Neither of these are very honest perspectives.

Comments

Re: Storms of the mind

[silas7.livejournal.com]

Yes, I'm finding that it's very difficult to argue with them. I can now objectivly say that I'm being dramatic or pessimistic when I'm that way, but the emotion just pulls you to say NO, THIS is how BAD it will BE. It's very important not to make any decisions when you're in that bad space. It's important to throw your focus elsewhere when you get into that bad space.

It's very easy to SAY this, but the doing will the ongoing struggle.

The clouds are receding more today.

Re: Storms of the mind

[flutterby369.livejournal.com]

Most things in this crazy life are easier said than done, but that is the challange that I live for, to see how far some things can be pushed or denied before I relent.

It does get easier, but just remember, no one is perfect, everyone has their clouds.

Re: Storms of the mind

[silas7.livejournal.com]

Sometimes it's not enough for me to think that. Sometimes I want to see those clouds.

We all get challenges and hurdles put up in our paths every day. It's a wonder we can be happy at all.

Re: Storms of the mind

[flutterby369.livejournal.com]

I hear ya on the cloud issue. There are times that people do not understand me and my love of some of my issues and such. For me, seeing those clouds and choosing to reach out reminds me that everything is relative, everything has a perspective that can be changed at a moments notice, to help me examine the situation more closely, which I love for I am a true analyzier.

I would love to have some of my challanges and hurdles disappear, just because they are so childish and outdated and unwanted. There are some challanges that I love to keep, for I am always up for a challange. Just depends on how you see the challange is the mood you will take. That is what took me a long time to learn. Becoming optomistic is another. Wow, I sometimes forgot how dark I once was. No, it is still there, but not such a big part of me anymore.